it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize