she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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