The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
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when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
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