You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
