Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
