Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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