did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
