there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
Panties = found
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize