i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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