im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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