Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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