He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize