Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
