if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
