worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
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Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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