is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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