I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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