he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
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