so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
