i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Randomize
