If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
