is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
Randomize
