either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
You've changed since you got that strap on
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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