Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Yo dont text me then not text me
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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