why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
