My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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