I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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