i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
