You're so nebulous sometimes
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Randomize
