i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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