I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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