I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize