Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
