I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
