i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
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