I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
whose ass print is on the piano?
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
