i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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