So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
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