I heard we made out
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
