i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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