Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
