Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
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