There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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