We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
