We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
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