She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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