so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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