Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
