That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
