i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
being pregnant is like rehab
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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