Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
